By the Grace of God and with the help of Al-anon programme, i am living a happy, comfortable and peaceful life.
I came to Al-anon 15 years back and at that time, there were only a few Al-anon groups in my District. That is Malappuram District in Kerala. But I started attending Al-anon meetings, wherever i could, started reading Al-anon literature, and focused only on my recovery . Earlier, i was always focusing on my alcoholic and being worried about him and sad and low due to his behaviour. Later, i stopped focusing on my alcoholic and others, i started focusing on myself. I practiced detachment and then i came to Service in Al-anon, became, Treasurer, Secretary, Chairperson etc. of my home group, Karuna AFG, then i became IGR of my AFG. And i started attending Inter-group meeting which was not in my District. It was in Calicut, the nearby District.. I had to travel for almost 2 hours to reach there.
Before Al-anon, i was afraid to travel alone, i was not confident also, i felt that i cannot do this… I cannot do that, I am good for nothing. etc., Due to Al-anon, i started finding time for myself, caring for me. loving me and Alanon taught me to be happy and positive. My confidence level increased. Whatever happens , i started finding happiness in each moment. And so, i enjoyed the travel and intergroup meetings. I travelled by enjoying each moment without worrying whether i will reach there in time or not, i left that to God..I Was able to let go of many things which was affecting me and many persons to God, without trying to change them. And let God take care of that.
Whenever some problem arose, I started asking the question : Can u change it? If the answer is No, I will let go that. If the answer is Yes. and i am the reason for that problem, I Will practice to change or correct myself. I know i can progress, but cannot be a perfect person. So .with the help of this wonderful programme, by practicing the Steps, Slogans etc. I am able to progress, day by day.
Before Al-anon, i was waiting for someone else to provide me peace, happiness, comfort etc., But today i know I am the one who can provide me all these. So i was able to enjoy everything i saw in my journey, enjoy the trips and find that solo trips are more comfortable than going with my AH. Because, when i am with him, I used to hear, ‘don’t do that, don’t do this etc.’ ,So. I felt more freedom and happiness in my solo trips.. I started doing what made me happy (earlier, i was doing everything to make others happy, I never thought about my likes or my happiness. Even in the case of cooking some dish I never cooked what i liked) I felt so relaxed when i did something for myself.. Dressed Up for my comfort.. Cooked for myself..
I stopped worrying about the past as i knew that i cannot walk back to the past and correct something there.. I stopped worrying about the future.. Because i understood that future is like an unborn baby. We cannot do anything.. But just wait to see what will happen and not spoil our present, by just worrying about the future.. So i started living in the present day, present moment..
I was able to forgive my AH for whatever he has done to me.. Forgive me also for what ever i had done ..FORGIVENESS gave me such a relief.
Later, in Inter-group, i was given the post of Joint PI (Public Information) and I was helping the PI Chairperson, to co ordinate the PI work in Kerala, and after her period, i was given the post of PI Chairperson and i am so happy that i was able to co-ordinate and do so much PI work in Kerala, especially in Calicut. As our Inter-group is situated in Calicut, we get more enquiries from there. Then i attended the South Zone Meetings, and from there i found the necessity of the Service Manual . Whenever there was a doubt came everyone was checking the Service Manual. So I also purchased my own copy..
Discussion of the Structure and District Committee was there in our Intergroup Meeting and South Zone Meeting.. And so District Committee was formed in Kerala. First district was formed in Calicut in the year 2011 . Then later 2nd, 3rd etc.. Now there are 7 Districts in Area 1.. And the Public Information (PI) work and Beginners Meetings are done by the Districts respectively..
I became DR of the 4th District. After that i became the Area Committee Chairperson and then i became the Delegate of Kerala, now called as Area 1. Today, i am so happy that i am able to do something for Al-anon due to my Service, i know.. I am doing only very little in service but i am happy.. GOD gave me the opportunity to do at least this much..
Thanks to the Fellowship and to each and everyone of you, who helped in my recovery and service… Thank you.
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