Choosing Happiness In Al-Anon
I am into Al-Anon programme from many many years, my alcoholic was into A.A. some years back ,since then he is in & out from his sobriety.
My alky has severe psoriasis a skin diseases which gives lot of itching & irritation. Doctors have told him that any toxins would aggravate the disease, but he is not able to overcome his craving for alcohol, where the relapses are for 8-15 days every 30-50 days. Those days of relapse are as 24 hrs a day he is under the effect of alcohol. All his work comes to standstill.
My son lives in U.S. He wanted me & my alky to be with him for few days .But I was worried rather scared to go with my alky. Till date whenever my alky would go out of city he would slip & it reaches to such a state that he is not aware of doing anything even the smallest of thing the right way.
My problem was I couldn’t leave him home nor did I want to travel with him.But I wanted to go meet & stay with my son & daughter –in-law. I was totally confused.Al-anon has taught me to take help of a sponsor in such confusing times. My sponsor asked me to write the pros & cons for not going atall, going without my alky & going with him. In the mean time my son called & I told him I was scared to travel with my alky as there was all the possibility of his relapse.On hearing this my son asked me,” mom! This situation may never change so you will never come & stay with us? Is it right to live in fear? You don’t worry if dad has a slip, you just let him be he will find his way out at the airport as he usually reaches where he wants to even when he is totally drunk.!”
After talking to my sponsor & my son and writing the pros & cons, I was clear of what I wanted to do. I decided that I want to meet my son & daughter-in-law. That means I have to go & that too with my alky, maybe he would not slip!!!!!!,whatever the situation arises I will face it. So now I was willing to face the situation without getting disturbed if atall the alky doesnot stay sober.Days before travelling I attended more meetings ,was in contact with my sponsor, meditated that I am going to enjoy the trip throughout. As soon as we left our city he started his drinking & it went on till we returned back home& some more days.
I had great time with my children,they took us to Miami there too,we had great time together. My alky was in his world drinking , eating, sleeping. But we had great time at the Miami beach ,at the everglades, at the sea world.We enjoyed at the fullest. Sometimes children would get little angry as they wanted to share this happiness with their dad too! This was the best trip in my life after my marriage of 34 years! This was possible only because of AL-ANON. Al-Anon has taught me to choose happiness in every situation.